Living in Constant WTF

No city is entirely normal, but things are really strange around here this week.
On my Thursday evening 8 mile run a woman spit on me.  Not like on me, but right at my feet as I ran by and it’s not like she didn’t see me coming.  Why would anyone do this?  She could have spit in the other direction or just not at all I mean she was carrying groceries not exercising.

Conversation on a regular day.
Me: I’ve been flossing a lot more since I went to this new Dentist.
Friend: Yeah, I mean I don’t know why I don’t floss more often.  I’m always just sitting on the couch or in bed, I could just do it then.
Me: Wait… you floss in bed?
Friend: Yeah.
Me: What!  No, that’s just gross, you don’t Actually do that do you? 
Friend: Yeah I do.
Me: I’m telling you that’s not normal and it really is pretty gross.  I’m really grossed out by that habit.
Friend: No!  It’s not that bad, you are exaggerating.
Me: Ok, I need assistance on this one, you need to know this is not Ok.  I mean besides the fact it was on The Marriage Ref and the country decided it was gross.
Third Party: Flossing anywhere but in the bathroom is completely unacceptable.
Me: I know, right?  I would like breakup with someone over that. 
Third Party: I wouldn’t even talk to them, I would throw that person off a cliff.
[Who’s exaggerating now?]

Today, saw a man drinking from a gallon of milk on a bench in an upscale mall.  He was dressed nicely as if he were just taking a little lunch break but he happened to bring a gallon of milk instead of say a cup.  I really hope he didn’t drink that whole thing.  I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about it.

I just got an email asking me to volunteer for the Fluff Festival.  Fluff was invented here and I can learn all about the millions of uses for it, and if I ever ate this mystery product I might actually do it. 

This week in Boston they found an alligator in the Charles River.  An Alligator Bs, and it was Real.  I love wild life, but I do not like big chomping ugly creatures roaming free where I live.

There are thousands of fresh water jellyfish in Walden Pond.  It makes no sense.  My BFF said that world is ending, I can’t even get into the bizarre stuff that people are doing with Tylenol to kill snakes.

Anyways, Happy Friday, I know this post was a waste of time for many of you.
I hope everyone eats something delicious tonight!

About Laura

Working mom trying to balance life and baby.
This entry was posted in IDIOTS. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Living in Constant WTF

  1. sarah says:

    I stayed at a house with a friend who sat with her toothbrush in her mouth whilst we watched TV. I looked the other way. Flossing in bed is even more vile, and actually makes me a little sick to think about now.

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